A&E biographies
an additional note: i'm terrified of greatness, i've decided. i just got through watching 'malcom x' and 'ghandi' (both on the same day, which sums to just under 7 hours of tv-viewage on one day, gross). i have a stack of A&E biographies to tackle next. i've been reading st. teresa of avila and quoting thomas merton and making art with the same gandhi and neil armstrong and katherine stinson (stunt pilot in the early days of aviation) juxtaposed.
and i'm terrified of greatness. i guess it's because i know i couldn't handle it right now. i'd take myself too seriously and end up damaging myself and those around me more than the gifts of greatness would be worth. the greatest heroes must be the humblest. the greatest heroes must laugh the most, play the most and have the greatest abilities to relax. i have only just begun my 'downward journey' which is the shedding of self and the taking on of the Christ beyond me, but i'm still in one of st. teresa's first or second dwelling places and have yet a long journey ahead of me. and this is why i am not yet at seminary, because i still find myself to be my own worst enemy more often than i'd like to admit. so i guess it's not really greatness i'm afraid of, but rather it is myself. fortunately, Christianity is a religion (the only as far as i've yet encountered) that offers a relief from self. good news.
PLUS, if i were really to think about it, i'd realize that i've lost my nalgene bottle at least 5 times today and my navel piercing is slightly infected and i think i'm narcoleptic because i spontaneously fell asleep in my chair for an hour earlier this evening. and upon realizing all these most ridiculous qualities in myself, i'd have no option but to laugh and wonder why i'm even worrying about greatness in the first place.
and i'm terrified of greatness. i guess it's because i know i couldn't handle it right now. i'd take myself too seriously and end up damaging myself and those around me more than the gifts of greatness would be worth. the greatest heroes must be the humblest. the greatest heroes must laugh the most, play the most and have the greatest abilities to relax. i have only just begun my 'downward journey' which is the shedding of self and the taking on of the Christ beyond me, but i'm still in one of st. teresa's first or second dwelling places and have yet a long journey ahead of me. and this is why i am not yet at seminary, because i still find myself to be my own worst enemy more often than i'd like to admit. so i guess it's not really greatness i'm afraid of, but rather it is myself. fortunately, Christianity is a religion (the only as far as i've yet encountered) that offers a relief from self. good news.
PLUS, if i were really to think about it, i'd realize that i've lost my nalgene bottle at least 5 times today and my navel piercing is slightly infected and i think i'm narcoleptic because i spontaneously fell asleep in my chair for an hour earlier this evening. and upon realizing all these most ridiculous qualities in myself, i'd have no option but to laugh and wonder why i'm even worrying about greatness in the first place.
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